“I keep watching what I do to see what I really believe.” ~ Sister Helen Prejean
I have that quote posted on the bulletin board above my desk. It reminds me that my life is made of actions. Whatever I believe, whatever philosophies I embrace or dreams I refuse to let go of, it is the things I do every day, big and little, that matter.
So, with that in mind, I made a to-do list for July (and beyond) that is all about making sure that if I watch what I do to see what I really believe, I won’t be disappointed.
- Write bravely – naked, alive, funny, vibrant, honest, lapel-grabbing, to the edges and out into the margins – every day.
- Finish my novel revisions.
- Cross something off the life list.
- In my personal life, open myself up, be vulnerable, accessible, clumsy, honest, present. Embrace the messy. Love fearlessly.
- Play hard; sleep well.
Okay, your turn. If at the end of July you wanted your actions to reflect what you believe, what would you be sure to do?
Wild
Great post J! Let me see if I can do this, kinda sorta not exactly:
1. Act like what I imagined an adult might act like, that is to be genuine and honest, and to not let petty little things bother me (I know how fooled was I?!)
2. To look at my emotions and determine if I’ve been wronged, complimented, or misunderstood – and to respond in a way that reflects my disappointment, gratitude or explain myself better.
3. Provide the kindness I receive everyday to someone I do not know.
4. Now the hardest one – to think about what i do believe and write it down, try to find a way to live what I believe, honestly.
5. To finally get that I cannot carry my first cup of coffee with me everywhere especially when picking up the paper on the front porch – without spilling some of it. I can put it down, I can put it down, it’s not going anywhere, it’s not going anywhere… :o)
Ack, making me think – early and on too little sleep and too little coffee! Thank you J! xo
Okay, here goes:
1. Be a better friend to myself
2. Sit down and write without having to argue with my internal editor every minute
3. Learn how to sing well enough that I don’t feel I have to mouth “happy birthday”. Important because majority of family members have birthdays in summer.
4. Submit writing out there
5. Find the joy in the small as well as big things. Again.
Caroline, I love your list! Number 2 is so much harder than it sounds, but 4 is more fun than you’d think. Not easy, exactly, but fun… and grounding and freeing at the same time. I revisit my list every so often to make sure it still applies (given it seems I’m in the midst of constant evolution these days).
Thank you for finding me and commenting even though I posted the wrong link this morning at 1 am. You rock! xo
You are so cute. link shmink. I check your blog every morning hoping, hoping for more Jspiration :o) or Jinspiration whatever works. I’m not sure I can do any of those things, but I will try. You and B give me much of the inspiration needed for that list. xo :o)
1. Not have my in-laws visit at Thanksgiving and still have half my house prepped but not painted (it will be coming up on three years; enough procrastination, enough already!)
2. Get my 1st degree black belt this fall
3. Find my spiritual center – try to join some spiritual endeavor
4. Like you Judy I think it’s so important to Be Kind (to myself, to others)
I saw Eclipse at midnight so my sleep-deprived brain can only think so much. Off to drink some flat-cola from my Edward cup!
Mairi
Marisa, You should take singing lessons. I just watched a performance by someone who did that and it was awesome. I sat in my seat filled with admiration and certain I could never do it!
Chezhui, I thought you had your black belt. Go get that thing! It would be cooler (yes cooler) than my cape!
Ok — I’ve been think about this for several hours although that may not help what I ultimately write here — hmmm, we’ll see:
1) To be brave enough to say what is on the tip of my tongue instead of hoping someone will hear my words without me speaking them.
2) To stop leaning on others for my own validation because… hey, it’s just not good. Which brings me too…
3) Trust myself and validate myself (ok — so that’s totally not going to happen overnight ;-) )
4) Live in the moments of my choosing, and choose those moments well.
5) Well #5 is for me right now, you’ll know when it happens though. :-)
Thank you for this!
ps — I believe you’re going to do everything you believe you can do.
Such a great list! Right now, my main priority is to remember that play is my only work. The rest of the stuff is there, but it’s not important. :)
Becky, GREAT list! Your number 1 is funny because I was just writing this morning about my opposite problem… I have two modes: painfully direct and silent. I’m going to turn my musings into a post, because I agree with your goal even though it gets me into trouble.
Belle, Remember when we didn’t have to work at play? (On the other hand, good for you! Me too!)
Boy, I don’t remember the last time I did a to-do list! But doing this, I think I’ll be doing some good for myself. This what I can think of for now (and will probably add more as I go along):
1. Write and read more – because if I don’t do this, I got nothing else going for me.
2. Exercise everyday – getting more fit and healthy, I’ll feel better about myself.
3. Have as much fun as possible – because next school year, I will essentially be living under a rock.
4. Love myself more and be happy – because loneliness really loves me right now, and I hate it. Once I build more confidence, be happy, love myself…I can love others.
Cheers to mustering up lots of courage and accomplishing this list!
I was almost going to protest about #1, but the “every day” qualified it. I don’t know that you write that way every day because I am not seeing everyday writing. But I am beyond convinced that it is possible—-for you. So (oh, where are my pom-poms? Ok, got ‘em) “Rah-rah-rah this ain’t Lady Gaga! Go J! Go J! Go J!”
My list is more business related because that is what I believe right now . . . . so I wanna
1. Work smarter not harder
2. Learn more
3. Share more
4. Clean off my desk although that is not necessarily a reflection of what I believe, it just needs to be done.
Eman, You’re so awesome. If you were closer I’d tell you every day until I eventually broke through your resistance. (Kind of glad I’m over here, huh?) Try the “act how I want to feel” thing. It works better than you think. I do it ALL THE TIME.
Terre, Thank you, Miss Sparkly! I like learn more, share more. You can feel free to throw wisdom my way.
“I keep watching what I do to see what I really believe”. Nice, with a special emphasis on “really”. I would just copy your list & make it mine but I have not written a novel so I will change that one to: 2. focus on finishing something I think is worth finishing.
Adding one: 6. Smile & laugh hopefully with others everyday
Judy,
The thing I have been working on is to not worry about things that I can’t control, and deal with things as they come. In other words, to compartmentalize. I’ve found that I am calmer and concentrate better on the task at hand.
That’s all for now.
I have to come back tomorrow and read all of your brilliant blog buddies’ responses — I adire the line “off to drink a flat cola from my Edward cup”, that was perfect.
Thank you for this post and all posts. You are sooooo my Hero/Heroin . . . it’s weird to call someone your “Heroin”, wait, am I spelling that wrong? Well, anyway, it sounds like I’m addicted to you . . . hey, that’s right — I AM :) . It has a double meaning. O.k., I’m goofy cuz’ I woke up at 4:30 a.m. today. Just wanted to say, I LOVED reading your Life List . . . one thing that struck me is that I think I know different people who have done each of the things on your list . . . collectively, they have achieved The List (well except for the personalized stuff like “BL”). It could be a cool beginning to find out how many people you know have experienced what is on your list. I think Steve (former hubby) has done more of the ‘things’ on your list than anyone else I know. “My” Priest also could cross off a good number, especially “loving to the edges” — that’s a perfect phrase! O.k., I’m punchy and need to go to sleep . . . thank you, thank you, thank you for being so marvelously Judy :-)
If only you were my next door neighbor :) I think I’ll try this “act how I want to feel.” And I think I know what you mean by it. But…you think you can elaborate it a little more? How do I act more happy when I know how I really feel inside? Isn’t it just a facade? Does it really do anything? I want to try this with a full understanding.
Jack, Yes! We’ll share our lists, and your #6 is awesome so I’ll do that too. (Jack lists!)
Ralph, I’ve always thought of compartmentalizing as kind of a bad trait I have, but when you say it, it sounds like a strength. (I want to hire you as my personal spin doctor when I get rich. K?)
Carey, I adore you! *hugs you fiercely*
Eman, It’s very cool. I’ve blogged about it here http://zebrasounds.net/2010/04/02/faking-it/, and I borrowed the whole concept from Gretchen Rubin at the Happiness project Blog. It’s not a facade so much as that we think we act in certain ways because that’s how we feel, when actually we can induce feelings through action. We’re wired to go both ways. It’s cool. And it’s worked for me sometimes even in really hard situations.
Thanks so much, J! I really hope this aids even a little bit, especially right now…
I am a list-maker. Not so much a getting-things-on-the-list-done-doer.
1. Find my tai chi videotape and start doing it at least 15 minutes at least every other day. (More for the calming effect than exercise in the belief that working towards calmness helps me to think more clearly.)
2. Schedule all of the supposed-to-be-annual appointments like annual physical, eye doctor, gynecologist, mammogram. (Believing that we need to take care of our physical selves to accomplish anything.)
3. Unpack and either gift to other family members or display/use myself all of my late mother’s things that have been in boxes stacked floor-to-ceiling in my diningroom for two and a half years. (Believing that family is my number one priority in life, and sharing momentos from my mother’s life will bring joy, including to me.)
4. And then get my apartment totally reorganized. (In the belief that our home is a reflection of ourselves and an uncluttered environment helps us physically, mentally and emotionally.)
5. Start working through the emotional upheaval of the past six months and try to learn from my mistakes and discover what I believe. Maybe even what I want to do with the rest of my life.
6. Be kind.
A great post, J. Your list is amazing and sparkly awesome, just like you! Thanks for sharing and inviting us to participate.
Eman, I am so very fond of you! Breathe, and then try it once. You’ll be surprised. I am every time.
Dani, I love that you included the belief each task reflects. It has, indeed, been an emotional six months here too! I believe that getting to the heart of what you believe will be key to moving on. It’s why I posted that quote above my computer. To remind myself every day.